Me and Rocky II

Me and the dinner date

Part 1: The offer.

Part 2: Serious negotiating.

The guy lived in Dudrkadurkastan or somewhere like that...

Me and for Peet Sake

Part 1

Part 2

Me and the oblivious salmon

Me and the Rocky horror show

Part 1

Part 2

Me and the baby deal

So a few days later he decided to try again...

Me and the sexy shooting

Me and Sunny

Me and insatiable sex

Me and the cockfudger

Me and the numb skull

Me and the challenge

Part 1: The 5 minute challenge

Part 2: The defeat. I was wrong; he lasted 18 minutes! Impressive!

Me and the chastity belt

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

This guy just doesn't know when to give up. How can anyone be so oblivious to the fact they are being made fun of?!

Me and the Cool Italian

I'm pretty sure I haven't heard the last of this guy either...

Me and Bade Idil diddle the cat and the fiddle

Me and the facelift

It’s interesting how different profile pictures have impact on friend requests. When I first signed up for Facebook I searched high and low for the most flattering picture I could find of myself because, you know, us girls like to look our best.

I soon realised that when you’re a young girl with lots of pictures of yourself, retarded inbreds with no social life like to steal them, create fake profiles with it and pretend to be lesbians. So I very quickly removed all of my photos, made the very few of the remaining ones private and set on my quest to expose and destroy all retards.

So for ages I had a small picture of me and one of my female friends. I would say I got about 10 friend requests a day at least from strangers. I then changed my profile picture to a slightly blurry one of me and a group of friends. I would say that reduced the number of requests by about two thirds. I then changed my picture for a funny one of me in a Ninja Burka outfit. I hardly got any friend requests and the few I got were all from guys called Mohammed.

Since then I’ve experimented with a number of different profile pics including a picture of my name written in the sand (very few friend requests), me hidden behind a paper with a face drawn on it (very few friend requests), a picture of me and my boyfriend (no friend requests) and a picture of my shadow (weirdly a handful of friend requests from lesbians).

So anyway, if you get a friend request from someone whose profile picture is of an unnaturally attractive woman in underwear who claims to be lesbian or bisexual just remember; it’s actually a man who is inbred and stole the picture from someone else.

Me and the worthless picture swap

I've said before but I always think it's important to tell the truth!

Part 2: Me informing him of my plan to take over the world.

Me and the Queen

Part 1

Part 2

Me and the hot summers